So I don’t talk to my sister a lot. We are total opposites. Sometimes she annoys me to the fact I can’t stand her. I just texted her back about the mp3 message she sent and we replied back and forth.
She thinks I should fight to keep Austin. I said there’s no way of that. He’s so blinded by Annie that, that’s all he wants. I’m so blinded by him he’s all I want. It’s just stupid. She tells me not to give up. I can’t open his eyes. I can’t tell him anything. I know all the wrong he has done. I’ve dealt with that. I’m not going to be second to none. I know how hard it is to not want to give up on something you believe strongly in.
Maybe in the future if we are both unattached it might work. Right now and for how long. Until it’s over over his number one thought will always be Annie. I can’t compete with that. No matter how hard I fight. I’m sure even if she landed herself in hot water he would be ok with it because of his blinded love and infatuation.
I wish I could take back the past have him never meet her. If it wasn’t her he might have met someone regardless. Still he wouldn’t have turned into the mess he is now. Uncaring, unfeeling, destructive.
I don’t care whose tired of hearing about my rants at least I’m trying to heal and I’m not keeping the pain in. I wanna talk about it. Hopefully one day I won’t care. The pain won’t hurt. Seeing his name or speaking his name won’t hurt. It’s just a raw emotional wound that keep being infected. It just can’t heal.