Back to what made this blog. Feeling stupid and insecure and about near driven everyone away. I was in love with a narcissist. I truly didn’t fully enter my mind. When I figured out he was I assumed it was just the situation he was in. Then when he came back my way I didn’t even remember it. I was so overjoyed he was back I stupidly forgot he hurt me.
Now I’m here licking wounds. They never healed they’re like scars that never close. Maybe they’ve gotten to that point and I’ve ripped them open. I can truly say I survived him but I can’t say that I will make it out alive anytime soon.
I want nothing to do with anyone really. I get yelled at by my friends for even replying to his texts. Yea let me see you try it and how easy it is. Geez. Best part and what sealed the deal with his mentality is asking me if a friend would let him claim their kid on his taxes. You think after what you put me thru I will do that. He knows a lot of people why ask me.
So I’m back again feeling like it won’t ever get better. My life’s just a girl with dumb decisions. Heck I can raise and parent kids but I can’t even see deceitful ways of a grown man. What the hell does that tell you?!
Today Leslie tells me I should date myself. I told her about the situation that happened yesterday. Why I seem to be the creep magnet. She’s lucky I’ve known her since we were 12 or I would have taken that wrong. I told her Austin wasn’t a creep. She said yes he was for his deceitful nature. Blah.
I’m not sure how to date myself yet. I have kids. I’m a mother. I work full time. I’m responsible I pay my bills. I’m smart and intuitive. So why the heck am I attracting creeps. Ok I’m too nice at times. I get vulnerable at times. But still..
I know now that I can’t date right now it’s way to early. I see every guy as a possible manipulator. The last few I even spoke to for a short time gave me that vibe. When you come straight after me for sex. Instant creep category.
I hate to be alone with myself when I feel so vulnerable. Do I really need to change a part of me to not attract creeps.
When I tell Steven and Gina about what happened to Austin and I, what came out of their mouths was not what I expected!
Gina said yes it happened to her. Don’t feel bad. Her guy was living with the girlfriend. But would take Gina to moms home. Steven told me, that just happened Saturday night to my sister in law. Except the guy had two families
With both ladies.
I guess I’ve seen it on soap operas, tv shows but you never truly believe you will be the one involved in someone’s double life. I guess I got burnt, I got out unscathed. You hear of nasty bitter relationships like this that lead to violence.
Now I hope that my girls will avoid men like this for the future. Cross my fingers!
I met a lot of different people today. I took my daughters to a Fall Out Boy Concert. The fans were different then the fans when I saw Selena Gomez with the girls several months earlier. Now I’m not an old fogey. I see what kids wear and all that. I don’t judge! But it made me think of something that was told to me earlier today.
Impressions. I’m not talking about the ones comedians give either! Are you going to judge that girl because her hair is blue? Her thighs are big, her high waisted shorts? She clings on her man to much? Did you even speak a word to her? Nope an assumption was made. You saw something that you didn’t like. So automatically that means the person isn’t any good.
Pretty sad to say. That people judge people with accusing eyes.Never trying to see eye to eye. That’s their loss not mine. I’ve walked past hundreds of people and never made assumptions about anyone. Give chances. Don’t make excuses because you feel a certain way about things.
I laugh now because the insensitivity now a days is so bad. Insults added to injury is a norm!
How many of us have been scammed? It’s more than a handful. It gets to the point you can’t even stand answering phone calls or talking to people anymore.
Three years ago my mother answered a phone call. For some reason unbeknownst to me she gave out her debit card number. I find out three weeks later the whole scenario. There was a few calls before the incident in which they tried to claim she would win vacation tickets. When calls like this come in, I claim to be here and tell them nope sorry and hang up. The day in question I was at work.
A magazine company, third party extended her subscriptions to regular magazines. Good Housekeeping, Woman’s Day and Family Circle. They extended each until 2017. Literally six years worth. Then calls from the creditors come in. Wanting payment. They claimed my mom owed over twelve hundred dollars to them. When they call they ask how the magazines are. They know very well we received none. I told mom to name a magazine randomly we would have, haha like Playboy. Sometimes they rush off quickly when we say we never received anything.
I’ve had these people become nasty and one day I was so fed up I pulled the phone from her. This man screamed and told me to get off the phone. I said oh really you’re trying to scam an elderly woman out of her money?! I know everyone needs to make a living but honestly who can sleep at night being a scam artist. It’s sickening.
Some days I want to act like my mother and tell them, hey could I give you my daughters credit card and would they take the bait. I’ve told my young girls to pick up and say have you found my daddy yet.. Lol hey you have to find humor in it. I’ve blocked several numbers and I’ve contacted the Better Business Bureau in most of the cases they stop contacting me. Give it a few months a new so called collection agency takes over. I’m not afraid of these people. Are you going to tell me that threatening my mom with putting this on her credit report is a big thing? My moms credit is shot to shit. She has bad credit and she’s in her early sixties she isn’t so worried you know?
My concern is for millions out there getting scammed and harassed. It’s insane. I’m tired of the bullshit. It’s just not right.
So to whomever is reading, never ever let people like this get to you. Do what you can. File cease and desist letters. Do not give these people a dime. If you have elderly parents make sure that they don’t get scammed. If someone calls you make sure if they want your card number, I pay mine via check mail me the bill.
Kindly shove your magazines where the sun doesn’t shine!